Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
Demetri and Maria live in a little village in Cyprus, they are getting on in years and are devoted to each other. One day Demetri feels unwell and just before nightfall, for the last time, he tells Maria how much he loves her and, with a soft sigh, he dies.
Maria is heartbroken but the priest tells her "He was a good man and you can be sure he has gone to heaven".
Some time passes and Maria misses Demetri and wonders how he is getting on in heaven, so she takes the village taxi to Nicosia and she visits a medium.
"Can you get in touch with my Demetri?" she asks.
"Of course" says the medium and, spreading her hands on the table, she gently calls "Are you there, Demetri?" Nothing. "Are you there, Demetri?"
"He's coming through", she tells Maria, "Now you can speak to him yourself".
"Hello, Demetri mou, are you happy wher you are?"
"Hello, Maria, I am very happy", says Demetri "This is a wonderful, wonderful place".
"But what do you do all day?" asks Maria.
"Well", says Demetri "For breakfast I have salad and then I have sex All morning. Then for lunch I have salad and I have sex all afternoon. Then for dinner I have salad and then I have sex all night!!"
"But Demetri, I thought heaven was a holy place?"
"Who said anything about heaven?", replied Demetri, "I'm a rabbit up on Troodos!!!!".

Crowded elevator always smell different to midget.

Dumb man climb tree to get cherry, wise man spread limbs.

State of pregnancy exist when woman takes seriously something poked in fun.

Baseball all wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk.

House without toilet is uncanny.

Man's wife his better half, his mistress his better whole.

Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it.

It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.

Man have more hair on chest than woman, but on whole woman have more.

Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.

Man who lay woman on ground gets piece on earth.

Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.

Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding bag.